Breadcrumbing

Crumbs fallen off a piece of bread

In the context of interpersonal relationships, breadcrumbing is the practice of sporadically feigning interest in another person in order to keep them interested, despite lacking genuine investment in a relationship. It is regarded as a type of manipulation and can be either deliberate or unintentional. Breadcrumbing is most common in romantic contexts, particularly with the surge of online dating.

Breadcrumbing is an antisocial dating behavior, similar to ghosting. It is referred to by this name because it involves giving a romantic interest a trail of "breadcrumbs", small bits of intermittent communication, to keep them interested without committing to a serious relationship. This is intended to give the 'breadcrumbee' (the receiver) false hope so that they will remain invested. Breadcrumbs might include randomly liking posts or sending flirtatious messages, and require little effort from the "breadcrumber" (the sender), and will often involve a demonstration and then withdrawal of interest.

Whereas with ghosting the aim is to end the relationship, breadcrumbing's goal is to prevent a relationship from ending, while keeping it from progressing by not fully committing to it. According to Stanley's theory of commitment, these objectives are not the same.[citation needed] This theory splits commitment into two different constructs: personal dedication and constraint commitment. Personal dedication encompasses an individual's drive to advance a relationship, something that may be lacking for breadcrumbers, while commitment constraint involves the potential consequences of ending the relationship (such as financial repercussions) that force a relationship to be maintained, which are also not present in breadcrumbing.

A study found that 35.6% of people reported having experienced breadcrumbing.

Causes

Personality

Research has found that some of the main reasons people breadcrumb are because they are seeking attention, do not want to be alone, and/or have low self-esteem. Certain personality traits or certain types of people may be more likely to breadcrumb, in particular those who score highly on vulnerable narcissism and hold views similar to those with psychological Machiavellianism. It is suggested that as vulnerable narcissists seek attention and approval from others in order to increase their self-esteem, breadcrumbing is a way for them to fulfill these needs[verification needed] without needing to commit to or end the relationship.

Attachment style

Breadcrumbing and insecure (avoidant or anxious) attachment styles are linked. One characteristic of individuals with avoidant attachment is keeping a distance from romantic interests to avoid intimacy, which is a fundamental aspect of breadcrumbing. Individuals with anxious attachment seek validation and they may hope that by leaving gaps between communication (as in through breadcrumbing) the breadcrumbee will pursue them, providing the sought-after validation. They also demonstrate push-and-pull behaviours in relationships; they want intimacy but at the same time are afraid of being rejected, and thus push their partner away.

Psychological consequences

As breadcrumbing is persistent and communication does not completely end, unlike with ghosting, it can be more distressing for breadcrumbees and prolong emotional recovery. Subsequently, victims of breadcrumbing are more likely to have lower life satisfaction and feel lonelier. Breadcrumbees often struggle with trust issues and reduced self-esteem and experience feelings of insecurity, jealousy, and anger. This can lead to even more severe consequences for mental and physical health, with some breadcrumbees facing depression, exhaustion, and skin problems. Breadcrumbing has also been found to sometimes occur simultaneously with gaslighting, for example if the breadcrumber implies the breadcrumbee is at fault.

Research has shown that there are effective ways to cope with being breadcrumbed that may help people minimize or avoid psychosocial consequences. These include redirecting focus away from the relationship and towards oneself.

A 2025 cross-sectional survey of 544 participants in the United Kingdom found that exposure to breadcrumbing from current or former dating partners was indirectly associated with paranoid ideation through lower perceived social support. The study's correlational design did not establish causality.

See also

References

  1. ↑ Khattar, Vivek; Upadhyay, Shreya; Navarro, Raúl (8 February 2023). "Young Adults' Perception of Breadcrumbing Victimization in Dating Relationships". Societies. 13 (2): 41. doi:10.3390/soc13020041. ISSN 2075-4698.
  2. 1 2 3 Willis, Megan L.; Oliver, Eliza; March, Evita (1 June 2023). "Dating in the dark: Vulnerable narcissism predicts inauthentic self-presentation in online dating". Telematics and Informatics. 81 101985. doi:10.1016/j.tele.2023.101985. ISSN 0736-5853.
  3. 1 2 3 4 Navarro, Raúl; Larrañaga, Elisa; Yubero, Santiago; Víllora, Beatriz (January 2020). "Psychological Correlates of Ghosting and Breadcrumbing Experiences: A Preliminary Study among Adults". International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health. 17 (3): 1116. doi:10.3390/ijerph17031116. ISSN 1660-4601. PMC 7037474. PMID 32050561.
  4. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 Khattar, Vivek; Upadhyay, Shreya; Navarro, Raúl (February 2023). "Young Adults' Perception of Breadcrumbing Victimization in Dating Relationships". Societies. 13 (2): 41. doi:10.3390/soc13020041. ISSN 2075-4698.
  5. ↑ Stanley, Scott M.; Markman, Howard J. (1992). "Assessing Commitment in Personal Relationships". Journal of Marriage and Family. 54 (3): 595–608. doi:10.2307/353245. ISSN 0022-2445. JSTOR 353245.
  6. ↑ Navarro, Raúl; Larrañaga, Elisa; Yubero, Santiago; Villora, Beatriz (2020). "Ghosting and breadcrumbing: prevalence and association with online dating behavior among young adults". Escritos de Psicología – Psychological Writings. 13 (2): 46–59. ISSN 1138-2635.
  7. ↑ https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC5118622/
  8. 1 2 3 Khattar, Vivek; Huete, Nuria; Navarro, Raúl (25 October 2023). "Attachment insecurity and breadcrumbing engagement in young adults: a cross-sectional, cross-country study in India and Spain". BMC Psychology. 11 (1): 356. doi:10.1186/s40359-023-01404-y. ISSN 2050-7283. PMC 10601106. PMID 37880762.
  9. ↑ Agishtein, Peryl; Brumbaugh, Claudia (December 2013). "Cultural variation in adult attachment: The impact of ethnicity, collectivism, and country of origin". Journal of Social, Evolutionary, and Cultural Psychology. 7 (4): 384–405. doi:10.1037/h0099181. ISSN 1933-5377.
  10. ↑ Rodríguez-García, Mª Carmen; Márquez-Hernández, Verónica V.; Granados-Gámez, Genoveva; Aguilera-Manrique, Gabriel; Martínez-Puertas, Helena; Gutiérrez-Puertas, Lorena (December 2020). "Development and Validation of Breadcrumbing in Affective-Sexual Relationships (BREAD-ASR) Questionnaire: Introducing a New Online Dating Perpetration". International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health. 17 (24): 9548. doi:10.3390/ijerph17249548. ISSN 1661-7827. PMC 7766626. PMID 33419336.
  11. ↑ Jaspal, Rusi; Lopes, Barbara (2025). "Breadcrumbing by a Dating Partner, Perceived Social Support, and Paranoia". Journal of Aggression, Maltreatment & Trauma. 34 (11): 1623–1640. doi:10.1080/10926771.2025.2555567.